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A Father’s Wish For His Son – Important Qualities to Instill in Your Son

| September 15, 2013

I want my son to grow up to be a nice person with self confidence and perseverance.

They are not the only qualities children should have and there is no right or wrong in this category. You may have different opinions on what qualities you wish to inspire in your children and I respect your choices. I am writing this to inspire other fathers to think about the qualities they want to see in their children if they have not done so before. I suggest two to four qualities or characteristics you wish to see your children obtain. As we all know, it’s hard to get them to listen as it is and trying to inspire too many qualities in someone can be overwhelming.

The first quality I wish to see in my children are that they become nice people.
They need to be respectful to others and be concerned about other people’s feelings. When they display any behavior towards anyone that is not generally viewed upon as “being nice” I calmly explain in a stern voice how their action was not nice and ask them how they might feel if someone did the same thing to them. Sometimes this tactic works and sometimes I feel like I am talking to a brick wall, but the point is I am consistent on how I treat them when they do something that is not nice. Of course, anytime they display behavior that is being nice or doing something nice for someone, I make sure to praise them and tell them how nice their action was.

The second quality I feel that is important that my children have is self confidence.
If children grow up with self confidence, I believe they will have the power to overcome any obstacles they may face as an adult. The way I have found to instill self confidence in my children is to help them find some activity where they can excel. There are so many things you can involve your children in today. Introduce them to many different things until they find something they enjoy. Once they enjoy something, the self confidence should slowly develop. Whether it is art or sports or singing, once they enjoy it do everything you can to help them improve. Try to keep some type of measurement of their progress so they can look back and see the progress they have made. In my opinion it is the incremental improvement in their activity of choice that build self confidence. I cannot overstate how important it is that children have this quality.

The third quality is perseverance.
No matter what path your child chooses in life, perseverance will be a quality they will need. The way I have tried to instill perseverance in my children is to always try to push them to do a little more of something than is required. This technique works best when doing homework. Whether it is a spelling list or math problems, I try to do my best to make sure they finish the assignment and do a little more. Spell one more word or do one more math problem. Even if it is a little bit more than required it slowly will teach them how to persevere. I also try to do my best to demonstrate perseverance in my own life. I am generally terrible at putting together toys, but if I have the instruction manual, I sit down with my kids and tell them, it might be hard but we have the instructions and we will put it together. Then of course, I HAVE to put that toy together, which I ultimately do (sometimes 2 hours later!), but I show them if I persevere, I can get anything done.

Instilling qualities and values in your son is what fatherhood is all about.

I enjoy spend time with my children. I am always striving to be a better father. It is a constant learning process. Occasionally, I even get a chance to post my thoughts and experiences to help other fathers.

Written by John Woloshine, http://www.dadismydad.comW

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